Even as a Christian, there are seasons where I feel so detached from God. No longer do I feel the burning of His presence in my heart when I pray, or my heart becomes nonchalant to things that would otherwise touch it so it brings tears of joy, compassion and love to my eyes. In other words, I feel sometimes so alone unless I feel God's constant presence tightly wrapped around me.
King David's situation, when he wrote the Book of Psalms becomes my cornerstone when it comes to these types of seasons for me. King David knew God intimately and God favored him during his reign as king. But there was one particular season where David became complacent in his walk with God. As a result, David fell into the sin of idleness. As we all know, idleness is the devil's workshop. While David's military was out fighting wars, David was at home doing absolutely nothing. He was coasting in his faith thinking grace will continue to come and taking God for granted assuming the blessings of the Lord will continue.
David falls deeper from the sin of idleness to the sin of carelessness. One day as he was walking out of his balcony, he notices a woman bathing and she was a vision to watch. His flesh took over and now he was inquiring about her. He fell into the trap and now he wants her. He succumb into the sin of adultery. David. The one who God favored, the one next to God's heart. David.
David's sin snowballs into the sin of callousness. He finds out that the woman whom he was committing adultery with was married to Uriah who was his right hand military man. Uriah trusted David. He gave his life to David, so much so that when David was ridden with guilt after finding out Bathsheba was pregnant with his baby, called for Uriah to come back from battle to sleep with his wife so he could hide the offspring of his sin. Even so, Uriah's dedication to David barred him from sleeping with his wife while the battle out there was hot. Oh uh. What to do? So David sends Uriah back to the hottest part of the battle and sure enough, he gets killed. It was all in David's plan to hide his sin of adultery resulting into the callousness of murder. What is sadder is that David's pride became more important to him than Uriah's life. While adultery is a hot-blooded sin, murder was a cold-blooded sin. He plotted the death of a devoted servant who was willing to die for David's honor, died before David's hand.
David was saved. But now you ask, can a saved man do this? The answer is certainly! But what sin can do to a saved person under the heavy hand of God that you know that you know that if you don't get right with God you're going to die soon (aka Conviction). The consequences of unforgiven sin goes on and on.
It took David about a year to confess his sin. He covered his sin as if God will forget what he had done. It is better for a saved one to confess his or her sin immediately and cleansed so that it doesn't fester or infect as quickly as it will. Confess your sins and obtain mercy from God immediately.
David talks about his secret sin in Psalms 32: 3-4. He told of his aging body that in one year, he looked like he aged 10 years. There is nothing that will prematurely age a Christian like unconfessed sin in his heart and in his mind. When God saves us, He doesn't fix you up that you cannot sin anymore, he fixes you so you cannot enjoy your sins anymore.
David felt God's heavy hand upon his heart as if God was squeezing the life out of him day and night, constantly. He felt shriveled and dry. Now it is a struggle for him to pray, to praise or to witness. He felt no joy, no victory or peace in his life.
I feel the same way when I cross God. I feel Him far away, I'm unable to pray, praise or witness with an open heart. But once I've confessed my sin to Him head-on, I feel closer to Jesus than any member of my family.
Most of the time we cover up our sins in various ways. We rationalize it. God doesn't accept alibis as an excuse for sin. He is omnipresent so He knows everything. He knows it before you do it.
Another way to cover up sin is to stay busy. Staying busy will mute God's voice in your heart. We also fall into hypocrisy. Nothing to see here, nothing is wrong, let's sweep everything under the rug and forget it.
Sidetrack: Moses when he was full of the Spirit of God walked around with his face shining so brightly that he had to wear a veil over his face so as not to blind anyone. It was the result of Moses' fellowship with God being with God up in the mountain for 40 days, his face became radiant. After being away from God, the glow started to fade and he had to wear a veil of steel so that the Israelites won't see that the glow was gone.
When we hide our sin, the next step is that God will convict us. When we are convicted, it is imperative that we confess our sins right away, directly to God, forsake the sin and immediately be forgiven. If we don't, God will chastise us.
Chastisement comes in different forms. It could take the form of an illness, sorrow, death, loss of money, health, or unanswered prayers. He does it not because He doesn't love us, on the contrary, its because He does.
God is more interested in your obedience than you driving a nice car, He is more interested in our relationship with Him than our health. This is what getting right with God really means.
If any of the above factors still bars you from getting right with God, he moves on to challenge you.
He did it to David. 2 Samuel 12 -He sent Nathan to point blank in David's face tell him that God sent him to challenge him about his sin. Nathan expected David to deny it. Instead, David admitted it openly that he sinned against God! David knew that this man was sent by God! Despite David's once close relationship to God, he is now challenged. If David denied his sin at that point, he would've surely died because God's next step would have been condemnation. Sin unto death 1John:5:16.
After Nathan left, David wrote Psalm 51. He knew God's heart. He had confidence that no matter what he had done, God still loved him. After confessing his sin and being forgiven, he received God's cleansing. He was once again saved, restored and used by God to further His kingdom.
So in conclusion, we have to be confident that even after we sin (which we will always do) we have to know that God loves us enough that if we confess our sins, get right with God, get forgiven, He will never forsake us. Why? For God so loved the world that He sent His only Son Jesus Christ so we may live in eternal life with Him. Eternal... that is a very very very very long time. Selah! (Think about it!)!
Until my next rant... LOVE ONE ANOHTER!
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