It is not a secret our kids mirror everything their parents do first and foremost. Just think, our kids grow up with the exact same actions, beliefs, opinions, mannerisms, etc. like we do. Well, you might say, of course, that’s because they inherit our genes!
Actually, yes, there are some factors that are genetic, such as facial features, body type, maybe even health issues. But have you ever stopped to think what we see in them that we see in ourselves, because of the fact that they were marinated in us 24/7 until they are old enough to go out into the world and acquire other people’s examples?
Children are very impressionable. Their formative years are 0-7 years old. They see and do what we show them and act out in front of them. Some are positives but I guess you now know what point I am making but I’ll go ahead and say it anyway. It is more important to show them and act in front of them what and how we would like them to act and take with them into adulthood.
I will now impart and admit to you what I saw in my kids as they grow into adulthood that I may or may not be so proud of.
All their lives they’ve seen me always passionate about my opinions about always doing the right thing. You may say, well that’s not so bad. Ok, so maybe not to you, but when it is done consistently, we all know that it could be taxing in this day and age when no one else ever cares about doing the right thing anymore. It is rampant in this world, agree? So, for a person who feels that others should also do what’s right, it may be very stressful because after all, one person cannot change the world. So what’s left? I don’t know maybe feelings of defeat, sadness, etc. Furthermore, I am not perfect, so there are times when even I can’t live up to what I believe. That’s what makes me human.
What I failed to do because of my own ignorance at the time was to follow it through with prayers. Teaching them that we needed to have that much faith in God that He will do the right thing and that the hope, healing and restructuring of humanity is not up to us. The best we can do is to become good examples to others, do the right thing anyway in the midst of decaying morality around us, and impart the righteousness to their own kids, and also to people around them but continuing to pray for those who don’t know any better because they have not seen the right way from their own parents.
It still brings challenge into my life to this day because I did live in a place and time where people were still good to one another, children were respectful to their parents and elders. When I hear about unruly kids in school, see the news about the ruckus that teenage and even adults cause in my community, I need to learn to pray for God to do something about this.
We have a responsibility to our kids to raise them the right way. PROPER Discipline is very critical with children because innocence make them push their parents to the brink of anger when they are not consistently disciplined simply because children crave for that structure. Children will respond to discipline without being physically hurt. Just remember never to spank with your own hand because they will associate your hand with something negative.
To this day, my kids will now laugh about how I would use my flip flops to THREATEN them of a butt spanking when they act out negatively. But when they were little, all I had to do was reach for it when they disobeyed and it seemed to work before it even touched them because when I did spank them ONCE and not out of anger but correction, their brain remembered the unpleasant experience. This is the kind of discipline, very simple and straightforward. Talking to them like they know what you mean is sometimes ineffective because they are not on the same intellectual level. Loving and praising them for doing something commendable is important as well.
What is it that you see in you that is predominant in your children? If you could, would you have done things differently? If so, would you be bold enough to advise them of the right way to handle things when they don’t go their way? Would you teach them to give their cares to God and let Him handle them?
Until my next rant..... LOVE ONE ANOTHER!
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