Saturday, August 25, 2012

Strong Morals and Good Parental Instructions


A hat is tipped for every parent today who gives good discipline and gives moral guidance to their children.  Ages 0-7 are a child’s most formative years in a child’s life when it comes to moral values.  No matter how much outside influence the world has waiting for them, as long as their core values are tightly woven and dictate how they function as good human beings.

My imperfect parents were strict; it seemed we were not allowed to do anything, at least in the mind of a reckless child.  Like all young people, we didn’t have the concept of “brakes” in our lives.  I guess this is why we have parents.  Parents are responsible for guiding us to know when to apply our brakes.  Although my parents were strict, I learned to discern the difference between good and bad decisions.

Imagine someone who grew up in a very innocent place such as the Philippines where there was no concept of “rights” or personal liberties such as it is here in the U.S.  When exposed to it at a young age (19), the transition from teenage to the “party” years, I was faced with dangerous influences from time to time.  At a party once, I was offered some hard drugs and although a little intoxicated from the already taboo gin and tonic, I still had the presence of mind to refuse it.  I quickly understood that my parents were strict for a reason, and now when that reason manifested itself, I was very grateful that they were.  One bad decision could have led me to a life of regrets.  But I’m pretty sure that my reaction to their discipline was very distasteful to them.  I realized and felt the same wrath from my two children when it was my turn to do the same.  As they look back to this when they become parents, they would realize the same.  And so on and so forth.

I’ve always taught my kids to share, care, sympathize, respect, pray, love, show affection, discipline etc.  I’m proud to be the parent of two children who possess all of these, and more, and it calms the worries that a parent has about their kids after being flung into the mix as they come of age. 

I have a little story about my son Jordan at the age of 6, when I was going through one of the worst phases of my life.  I believe I was upset at that time sitting on the couch when he sat next to me and rubbed my back with his little baby hand and said, “Mom, don’t cry, let’s go!  I have $26, I’m taking you out to dinner.”  Imagine the instant shock and joy from this unprompted invitation!  We got dressed and went to a little Chinese buffet and when the waitress came to hand me the check, I motioned for her to give it to the little cutie across the table.  She handed him the check and he reached into his pocket and pulled counted out $8 from the money he had been saving and proudly handed it to her.  What a special boy!  I don’t worry that Jordan will make someone a happy wife one day and be a great father. 

It is undeniable that good parenting is a difficult feat that is not to be taken lightly.  It is a great responsibility to be a parent.  It is not a business to have more so that the government can support the family whose heads just don’t want to work.  This almost always leads to sheer catastrophes.  At first I was shocked to hear about the horrible and tragic stories in the news about how people with children handle theirs, but it seems to be happening daily lately, that the shock value has diminished.  We need to realize that just because our parents had done us wrong, it is important to break the chain and make the change for our own children.  It takes a mature and rational thinker to do so.   Can you just imagine if children everywhere were as respectful as they were in Beaver Cleaver era?  Even the obnoxious Eddie Haskell was overly polite when dealing with June! 

Till my next rant…. LOVE ONE ANOTHER!



1 comment:

Anonymous said...

As a teacher I see the effects of a real lack of parenting in my community. It seems that too many parents are busy or distracted to be the guides their children need. I hope this message gets out and many parents respond to these wise words. Thanks for the powerful message.